What Happened?

for the most part i think my children are pretty well behaved, and i genuinely like being around them.

i don't know what happened tonight.

we let shaeya skip her nap (maybe part of the problem???) to play with tyden, so dave and i could have some time to ourselves- which was very nice.
then we decided to make a run to wal-mart with the kids to pick up a few important things- eggs, friut, roach spray.....
-yes, we have roaches. i've seen 2 in our basement, and the other night tyden came upstairs and proudly said, "guys, look what i found!" he was holding his arm out, and had a roach crawling up it. "isn't this cool??" right then, the roach saw the black hole of ty's sleeve and shot up his arm, straight up his sleeve to his armpit. ty was in a panic as he danced around trying to get his shirt off. i don't think i've laughed that hard in quite awhile......i'm still laughing.....but really ready to take care of the problem.

anyway, back to wal-mart. the kids were awful. fighting, whining (ty and shaeya), standing up in the cart, opening food, getting into my purse (tekoa).
tyden had slippery sandals on and kept trying to run a little and then slide, but kept falling. in front of other people's carts. shaeya kept complaining about us not letting her ride in the cart. she actually could hardly walk because her leg was hurting SO bad (there's nothing wrong with her leg). tekoa cried and cried because she didn't wan't to be in the cart, she wanted mommy to carry her. i have a hard enough time hauling myself around.

after wal-mart, i was tired, and thought it was a good night to just head to mcdonald's and let them eat and then run around at the outdoor playland.

great idea. first of all it was super windy. the kid's food and napkins kept blowing, and my salad kept blowing off my fork as i tried to take a bite.
it was a really good salad until somehow tekoa's shoe ended up landing in it. i kept telling myself- don't think about it, just eat it. i mean how dirty can the floors at wal-mart and mcdonald's REALLY be?

then a group from a handicapped home came and sat outside by us. it took about 2 minutes for tyden to blurt out- very loudly- that "those people sure talk funny, don't they?"
i told him- very quietly- not to say things like that out loud. it's not nice.

what WAS nice was when one of the guys in the group had a melt down and started screaming and yelling for everyone to LEAVE HIM THE @#%*@ ALONE!! my kid's jaws dropped about to the floor. but they didn't say anything. the one time they actually listened to me all night.

after that, we headed home. tyden and shaeya fought the whole way over their cup of water. they wouldn't listen to my assurances (okay, they may have been somewhat loud and angry assurances) that we have plenty more water at home. and koa was crying about one thing after another.

when we got home, i sent them to the bathroom to wash their hands and feet. which they did- in the sink- spraying water and soap everywhere. i walked in as they were drying their feet on the hand towel.

after that we put them all in bed amid a lot more crying and complaining. and by that time i was just really ready to be DONE. anyone else know that feeling? and they would not settle down. after they had been punished- a couple of times- they finally fell asleep.

so here i am wondering what in the world just happened?
maybe it's me. maybe i'm letting a few things slide that i normally wouldn't because i'm huge and tired. maybe i'm a bit preoccupied with the coming baby and counting down the days. maybe they need more than what i'm giving them.
or maybe it was just a bad night and i need to let it go and start over again tomorrow.